Falling asleep: the routine that works (and why you shouldn't change it)
You don't need to invent anything. You need to repeat exactly what happens at home.
Routine is the real magic.
Evening is when children feel their parents' absence most, and it's also when a new person gets tested. The good news: you don't need talent, you need repetition.
Get the exact sequence explained
Every family has its own, and it's almost always been the same for months: dinner, bath, pyjamas, teeth, a story, dim light, a specific object in bed. Ask for it in the precise order and don't improvise variations. For a child that sequence is the signal that it's time to sleep.
The mistakes that make it take longer
- Boisterous games in the last half hour
- Screens close to bedtime, unless the parents said otherwise
- Full light in the room
- Bargaining: "five more minutes" always becomes twenty
- Answering every call-out. After goodnight you can go back in briefly, without turning on the light
If they ask for their parents
Answer truthfully, calmly and without drama: they went out, they'll be back tonight, you're staying here. Vague phrases or generous lies ("they'll be back any minute") produce more anxiety, not less.
Sleep safety
For the youngest, follow whatever instructions the parents give you, to the letter: how they should be put down, what can stay in the cot, the room temperature. Don't add pillows, soft toys or blankets on your own initiative.
Once they're asleep
Don't disappear to another part of the house with headphones on. Check in, stay reachable, and note the time: when the parents get back they'll want to know it, and how long it took.
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